Creating a Healthy Money Mindset

Creating a Healthy Money Mindset

For the majority of my life I had a negative mindset about money, making money and saving money. But I had no idea how to change it or that it was even wrong. I wanted money, that’s for sure. Money was the cause of most of my stress, but I just couldn’t seem to get a handle on it. I know I wasn’t alone. In fact, America has hit an all time high in credit card debt; around 1 trillion dollars of debt to be exact. How can something we think about so often, something we want so badly have this negative affect on us? The truth is, like most workings of our mind, we just have to change the way we think about it. Finally, I feel like I’m at point where I finally have a healthy money mindset and it is not at all what I imagined it to be. There are steps and understandings I had to take to finally get a grip on my out of control money habits. So let’s talk about creating a healthy money mindset. 



Where do negative ideas about money come from?

First of all, let’s break it down into the top areas that a negative money mindset begins. When I first heard about some of these, I experienced those big “AHA” moments. Often times things can be so ingrained in us that we don’t think twice about them. These ideas are not meant to offend anyone or say for sure that these are where your personal thoughts may have originated. They are simply common suggestions.

Envy

Isn’t it so true that when deep down we are envious of a person, we tend to act out by cutting them down? You see someone with a more in-shape physique and you are either quick to tear them down or tear yourself down? This is also a common case with money. You see someone with a brand new car or who put in a new pool and you either wish you had what they have or you judge them for being materialistic. Neither of these are healthy options. Trust me, I’m totally guilty of them and it never got me anywhere.

Monkey see, money do (check out that word play)

Did you grow up in a home where money was tight or where credit card debt was just another bill? A lot of times people pick up money habits from their upbringing. If you heard mom and dad fighting about how money is tight, or watched them dig themselves into debt with purchase after purchase, you may have some learned bad habits. Personally, I know a common phrase I heard growing up (and then started saying myself) was, “We don’t have enough money for that.”

I definitely think I ingrained that phrase into our oldest daughter’s brain, which is why I’m now trying to make up for it by getting her started on healthy money habits at a young age. Now, when we really don’t have the funds for something I try to remind our kids that we do have money, we have plenty, and we are fortunate to have all that we have, we just have more important places to put our money.

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Wealth = Selfish

Then there’s the mindset that those with money must be selfish money hoarders. How can they have so much while the rest of us have so little? They must be selfish. We tell ourselves that we never want to be selfish. I know I personally have dug myself into debt by buying things for other people in attempts to not be selfish. I wanted to give and share and do things for the people I love. But the thing is, racking up credit card debt for others is literally pouring from a totally empty cup…a cup that gets deeper and deeper and harder to fill!

Mis-inturpruptations 

Don’t get mad at me, Dave Ramsey said this in his Financial Peace University course that I’m taking. This was my “aha” moment. I grew up attending church services every single Sunday. Something I will never regret. Growing up with faith gave me a peace throughout the hard times in my life. But a lot was also mis-interpreted to me. I grew up hearing sayings like, “It’s easier for a camel to fit through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the gates of heaven.” Then there are verses like this:

“For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil. Some people, eager for money, have wandered from the faith and pierced themselves with many griefs.”

Personally, I have more money saved than I ever used to. I talk about it more, I work for it more and yet, I love it a whole lot less. Rather than a love or a constant desire for it (like I used to have.) Every move I make with money is strategic, greed-less and done with wise intentions. You can be a billionaire and not love your money, or be broke as a joke and be totally obsessed with it. Something that never occurred to me before.

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Positive, honest truths about money. 

When we get busy accumulating a negative mindset about money, we tend to overlook some seriously great things about it. I picked up the book, You Are a Badass at Making Money: Master the Mindset of Wealth not really expecting to learn anything and within minutes was totally hooked. There were so many things that never occurred to me about money!

We need money

Well, that’s a given, right? But really…we need money for every single thing we want. If I were to make a list of the top three things I want out of life it would look something like this:

  1. Health and happiness for me and my children
  2. Travel
  3. Giving generously

Travel is a given; I need money for that if I plan on doing it successfully. AKA not hitchhiking.

Giving. Well, duh, I need to have money if I plan on giving it right?

Lastly happiness and health for me and my children. In this aspect money can provide healthy food and good medical care if we need it. It can also keep us pretty happy if I can go into my future knowing that Tom and I, and our kids will be financially at peace. I’ve been through the money struggle game and I don’t want that for my kids and I don’t want it for me anymore either!

Money doesn’t have a brain

Money is a lifeless object with absolutely no mind or thought process. That means you are in charge! Money has no magical powers; it is simply currency that we used to obtain things. Don’t let it run you. You’re the boss. You tell that money where to go, when to go there and how much of it needs to go. You’ve got the power.

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There is plenty to go around

There is about $1.2 trillion worth of cash floating around the good ‘ol USA these days. About 1% of the population is taking advantage of most of it. If you flip through magazines or watch TV and see how foolishly and selfishly some of these 1% are spending their money then let me tell you…you can take it back! If you have real plans that will add value to the world around you, then it’s time you got smart about your money so you can make it happen! Don’t ever think that there isn’t enough money to make your dreams come true. Even if that just means saving enough for an easy retirement. There is $1.2 trillion…get yours.

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It’s made to be shared

In case you haven’t heard me say this 8,000 times, then here it is: When an act of giving or kindness is done the serotonin (happy) levels increase in the person who does the good deed. It feels good to share what we’ve got, whether that be money, talents or time. The serotonin levels also increase in the person who is on the receiving end and any person who happens to see the act of kindness take place. The point is, everyone wins when you give. The problem is, it’s hard to give with a happy heart when you are stressed to the max about money. This is why it is crucial to get smart with your money so that you can give freely and happily. Spread the wealth. I used to hoard money like crazy because I felt like I never had enough. Now, I give more freely than ever because I’ve flipped my mindset about it – – and I took smart financial steps in the right direction.

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How to change your thinking.  

It’s all good, because there are easy things you can do that will help you change your way of thinking.

Make a list

Start your mind switch by making a list of all the things you want the most out of life. Go ahead and just let it all pour out onto the paper.

After you’ve gotten written down all the thing you want the most, take the time to cross some stuff off. Once you get it all out, it becomes easier to cross off the things that just aren’t as important. Once you’ve got your list narrowed down, take the time to number things from 1-10 so you know your top 0 biggest priorities.

Now that you have your priorities written down, take a look at your monthly spending and see what things you may be spending money on that don’t align with your priorities. Don’t slack on this step. If your top priority is to get in shape, don’t try to justify $200 worth of new yoga pants that you know you’re only wearing around the house!

Saving is not wasting

Personally, I know that when I was putting money into savings, it was painful knowing there was money there that I could easily access and spend. It felt like I was robbing myself. It’s so important to remember that saving money is still for you. Let go of any pull you feel to spend it. A great way to do this is to get a savings account that is separate from your regular bank preferably one that’s tough to get at. Set up automatic transfers and then just steer clear. You are not depriving yourself of spending money. You are building for your future and for the things you really want out of life.

Practice delayed gratification

When we first moved into our house, there were several big purchases that I didn’t buy. Normally, when we’d moved, I would grab my credit card and go shopping for whatever new things I felt like we needed. This time, I saved, and I waited. For months we didn’t have a TV stand. Our living room looked so empty with the TV attached to the wall and nothing but wires underneath it.

We also didn’t have bar stools for our center island in the kitchen. Our kitchen table only had 4 seats, which meant there wasn’t enough for our family of 5. Bar stools would definitely have come in handy. I waited, and saved and when I was finally able to afford those stools, I was happier than I had ever been with any purchase I had ever made. I really felt like I had earned them. The anticipation of getting closer and closer to my goal was a great thrill and a very proud moment.

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There’s a difference between hoarding and abundance

Like I said, money can conquer anyone who lets it. It doesn’t matter how much money you have. There are those who hoard their money, who don’t share it with anyone and use it only for their own personal gain. That’s no way to live your life or spend your money. Abundance is a far different thing. Abundance is a cup that overflows and spills into the lives of other people. So as you start to save, be sure to keep your heart and intentions in the right place.

Final thoughts…

Be patient with yourself. Keep your priorities in mind. Remember you will have set backs, you’ll make mistakes, but if you can stick with smart money choices, you will absolutely be glad that you did.

Time and Money Saver Recommendations

$5 Meal Plan – The $5 meal plan was created by a busy mother of 4 for other busy mother’s out there. Get access to healthy meal plans that take all the guess work out of what to make for your family!

BeFrugal – Be Frugal is an online resources for the best coupons around. In stores, online or in restaurants.

Dosh – Dosh is an app that links up to your credit cards (or qualifying debit cards) and gives you money back on purchases you make. It works like other cash back apps by refunding you money on qualifying purchases. Only you don’t have to keep track, it scans discounts and gives you money back automatically!

IBotta – IBotta is a totally free app that pays you $10 just for signing up. With this app you can get paid for the things you already plan on buying!

Love and Money – Online courses to help couples and family get finances together in order to stay together!

Paperless Home – The paperless home guides you step by step through how to start creating a home where all of your most important information can always be in one place and always at your finger tips!

Simplify + Planner – Abby Lawson from Just a Girl and Her Blog has a great and inexpensive planner to help you get intentionally organized. Starting a blog can be very overwhelming and getting a little organized can go a long way.

Target Debit Card – If you shop at Target as much as me, you should definitely get in on the debit card if you haven’t already. All it does is remove money from your regular checking account like a regular debit card, but saves you 5% on your purchases every time you use it!

Don’t Forget to PIN This!

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47 COMMENTS

  1. Kayla | 22nd Jan 18

    Great article! Money is definitely made to be shared and it’s all about perspective. 💗

  2. Heather | 22nd Jan 18

    It’s so true that your upbringing can influence your spending habits. We were so poor when I was growing up that I am often guilty of getting my kids too many “things” as a way to compensate! Not good!

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 22nd Jan 18

      It’s tough to learn from our pasts. I was guilty of the “eh…just put it on a credit card” mindset. Debt was just a common topic in our house.

  3. Duia | 22nd Jan 18

    great advice! thank you

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 22nd Jan 18

      You betcha!

  4. candy | 22nd Jan 18

    First we always seem to want to keep up with our friends. Eat out way to much. Tracking spending on little things like that cup of coffee or soda you have to purchase twice a day. All adds up.

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 22nd Jan 18

      I have definitely been there. It’s sill how those small things can take away so much of the things we REALLY want!

  5. Lindsey | 22nd Jan 18

    We try and be money positive in our house. Instead of saying we can’t afford that we come up with a saving plan. We especially love to include the kids so they can learn while they are young. Money management is such an important skill.

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 22nd Jan 18

      So important to include them…the earlier the better!

  6. Laura @ Mickey Chatter | 22nd Jan 18

    Some great perspective in this article! Money is often the biggest cause of stress, so working on having a healthy relationship with it would really help a lot of people. My biggest takeaway is the delayed gratification. Such an important lesson to learn – save and earn it rather than impulse buying. I emphasize that with my daughter all the time 🙂

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 22nd Jan 18

      Exactly. I’m so thankful to have really learned delayed gratification!

  7. Allison | 22nd Jan 18

    I once read that wealth is relative to the people around you. So, if you are surrounded by people who have more money than you, regardless of how much you make, you are going to feel like you need more. I think this post is a great reminder that money is not everything and that it’s important to develop healthy relationships with our wealth 🙂

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 22nd Jan 18

      That makes sense. I spent so much time wanting what everyone else had. I wanted the stuff but I didn’t want the discipline behind managing the money needed. Now after getting smarter with the money I want the stuff less!

  8. jessie | 22nd Jan 18

    These are so great! A good money mindset is definitely a must have! Saving a few of these resources for later.

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 22nd Jan 18

      It really has totally transformed my life@ Thanks Jessie!

  9. Anissa | 22nd Jan 18

    Money is such an emotional taboo topic! People need to have more conversations about what to do with money as far as investing, Saving and money management in general! Great post!

  10. D'Ana Joi | 22nd Jan 18

    I really appreciate the shift in perspective from “not having enough money for that” to, “choosing to spend money on something else” at the time. What an important distinction! Thank you for these great tips.

    xo,
    Joi

    https://Joi-Knows-How.com

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 22nd Jan 18

      I’m glad you like it Joi. Thank you.

  11. Cassy | 22nd Jan 18

    I love changing “we don’t have enough money for that” to “we have more important things to spend money on.” My daughter is still a baby, but I’m going to keep that in mind as she gets older. Great post!

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 22nd Jan 18

      It has really helped with our younger ones verses our older one. We tell them what we are choosing to spend our money on and how it’s more important than whatever little thing we may be wanting at the time.

  12. Nadine | 22nd Jan 18

    Super in-depth article. Very insightful and I loved how you broke it down. I will be making that list and sorting out my feelings about money. Great read!

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 22nd Jan 18

      Thanks so much Nadine! Good luck.

  13. Denise | 23rd Jan 18

    This is a great article and you are so right on many points, unless we change our mindset about money it will always be a source of too much stress. thanks for sharing.

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 23rd Jan 18

      I have found a mindset change can basically change anything in life!

  14. ShootingStarsMag | 23rd Jan 18

    Great post. Money is definitely a tricky subject for people to talk about or understand. I don’t mind saving, I just wish I had more money TO save. One day though!

    -Lauren

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 23rd Jan 18

      It’s all about small steps! Keep it up, you got this!

  15. Mandi Em | 23rd Jan 18

    I totally want to read you are a badass at making money! Become debt free was such an eye opener for our family about money. I am a bit of a money weirdo now I am like a money saving ninja lol

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 23rd Jan 18

      It’s so rewarding to get wise isn’t it? I bet you would love the book!

  16. Anne | onedeterminedlife | 23rd Jan 18

    I am so thankful that my parents instilled in me some great money mindsets. I’m still trying to figure out how they did that so I can pass it all on to my own kids.

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 23rd Jan 18

      That is so great to hear!! I’m hoping I can do that for my kids!

  17. Sohaiba | 23rd Jan 18

    This is so important in todays age! Great post

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 23rd Jan 18

      I think so! I really feel like more people are catching on!

  18. Sarah | 23rd Jan 18

    Excellent resources! Building a good perspective on money and it’s used it pivotal to building god management habits.

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 23rd Jan 18

      So glad you see it that way!

  19. Emily @ Pizza & Pull-Ups | 23rd Jan 18

    Great advice, waiting and saving for purchases can be tough but is better than charging and paying off for ages if you can avoid it.

  20. Katie | 23rd Jan 18

    Great advice. I agree that dealing with your money the way the Lord would want you to is key to having a handle on your finances.

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 23rd Jan 18

      Thanks so much Katie!

  21. Christine | 23rd Jan 18

    What great ideas! I love seeing the different ways we can work to improve our situation. So important to remember these!

  22. Shani | Sunshine & Munchkins | 23rd Jan 18

    So much great information in this post! I grew up in a divorced home so my mom worked a lot and we just didn’t have a lot of money. It was also one of those things we never talked about. I knew we didn’t have a lot so I didn’t ask for much, but when I got older and married, I didn’t exactly know how to discuss it with my husband. It’s been a learning process but I agree that you really have to change your mindset, otherwise you won’t be able to make any real, lasting changes.

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 23rd Jan 18

      Absolutely! That would be tough to learn to manage!

  23. Rawlings sunday | 24th Jan 18

    Your mindset can either make you rich or poor as a result of the ideas formed when you were young. When you break away from this habits and change the way you think, you open the door to abundance.

    https://rawlingsunday.wordpress.com/2018/01/20/9-reasons-you-need-to-budget-your-money/

  24. Amy | 24th Jan 18

    Thanks for the list of resources on the web! Going to check out $5 meals.

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 24th Jan 18

      Absolutely!

  25. Anne | onedeterminedlife | 24th Jan 18

    I have 3 accounts, one for checking and 2 savings. It helps me not spend the money I want to save. It’s my best savings tip

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 24th Jan 18

      I need that too! Dave Ramsey’s Sinking Funds was a much needed idea in order to separate my money and avoid over-spending!

  26. Erica | 24th Jan 18

    I grew up poor and have struggled myself my whole life. I am changing that. Your post gave me a lot to think about. I’m pinning this so my fiancee and I can look at it together.

    • heartsoulwhole@gmail.com | 24th Jan 18

      I hope you can find ways to make it work for you!

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